Thursday, February 18, 2010

The transitional lifestyle

Hello, reporting live from 18-20 days without our stuff, thanks to the most horrible moving company of all time! What moving company, you ask? Oh, not the cheapest we considered - the one with the best rating! The moving company that will be properly reamed once my belongings are in my possession again! At least four more nights to go, maybe six. Can we make it? Here's a little snapshot into our days:

Oh, hello morning! Oh my god, why I am in so much pain? Right, because my back is on the floor again. Because if we don't wake up every two hours to reinflate this air mattress, we end up this way. Pain. Ow. Hurts. I haven't slept in a real bed in so long. Well damn, cat, try not to look so triumphant about the fact that you have a bed and we don't. I can see you gloating through your slumber!

Okay, breakfast time! Maybe eggs this morning? Toast? Crap, I just remembered how much of a pain it is to make breakfast here. The one pan I brought is stainless, which is a bear with eggs, and to toast bread I have to broil it in the oven and take it out the exact second it's ready or the fire alarms go off. Again. Hey, Fanny, don't give me that look - at least you have a toy! I don't even have a can opener!

Ugh, I think working from home makes this place seem even barer. It's driving me crazy in here! Must. Get. Out. Maybe go out for lunch? Oh wait, of the three pairs of shoes I packed, only one is snow-appropriate, and I'm so sick of wearing those boots that only match half of the tiny portion of clothes I brought with me that I'll die if I have to slip them on again. I'll just have a slice of cold pizza and enjoy the lovely kittens instead. What the... Fine, cat, I can see that you're also dreaming of escape from this empty existence. Tough life! At least you can run around in here!

Afternoon, this means T is home to study for his big certification test! We're so cozy and cute, both using the same old card table from my parents as a desk, papers surrounding us on the floor. This is awesome. This is what it's all about. Although, I am kind of sick of working... and my butt is totally sore from the uncomfortable chair. Maybe I'll go finish painting the bathroom instead. It's the one little area of space I can control in this crazy empty place. Only, crap, no step ladder! But conveniently, I have a 6'3 man around to finish the upper trim. "T! Can you come in here for a minute?" We're definitely not getting any work done this afternoon... Kittens! Make it okay! Tell us we won't get fired! Oh, I'm sorry Switters, what was that? You HOPE we get fired? Because we should be punished for putting you through this hell? Hmph.

Fun! Dinner out to avoid the reality of our living space! Let me just get dolled up... Oh god. The same clothes again. I swear I'm never wearing these pants again. At least I can make the rest of me look great. Or... not. My skin is awful. Where are my favorite masks and scrubs? No hair products, even. A shower with only trial-sized bottles in it. Grrrrrrrr. Fanny, really? If we leave for dinner instead of taking you out of this hellhole you're going to inflict lead poisoning on yourself? You're not kidding around this time, you say?

Dinner was great, feeling happy. Can't wait to go home and curl up in front of the Olympics with a glass of wine. Shit. The Situation. I forgot about it. To turn our "bed" into a "couch" we place it horizontally against the wall and use the pillows as back support. So sick of it. And we have to drink wine out of plastic cups. And then reinflate in two hours. Dammit, Fanny! Put down the pencil! I promise it'll be over soon! Life will return to normal in less than a week!

(We hope.)


  1. Aw, shug. WHAT THE HELL IS THE DEAL WITH THE MOVING COMPANY? Is it blizzard related? I would be losing my mind. Bless your heart.

  2. I'm so sorry for complaining about having to go without my Le Creuset and round brush for two days. At least you have cable and Internet? Hang in there! Brighter (and hopefully warmer) days are ahead.

  3. You poor thing! I can't believe it's been this long... but at least your cat has fabulous taste in handbags. Thanks for the heads up on the moving company.

  4. Didn't you move like a year ago? I'm confused.

  5. At least Switters and Fanny are A-DORABLE and good cuddly company. Especially with that pencil.
    I'm really sorry about the moving company. 18 days without your stuff?? I'd go nuts if I had to sleep on an air mattress that long. I hope they give you money back.

  6. This is ridiculous, really. However, this post of yours made me laugh out loud-I'm glad you are using your sense of humor to make the best of things :)

  7. Bless your heart.....this too shall pass! Get a foam topper for the will save your back (can then be put on guest bed). Venting is healthy....otherwise we explode!

  8. that sounds truly awful! hope you get your stuff soon! and punch the moving company people in the face! actually don't...i shouldn't condone violence during lent.

  9. Omg this sounds just like my recent move from FL to THE UK! What the hell can take a moving company so long to move from state to state?? Can't wait to hear who you used....humor is the only way to not go insane in these situations....hang in there!

  10. Oh Maggie!

    Now you know what my May-December was like ... and we're still camping. I feel your pain.

    Just remember, this too shall pass and you'll be settling in soon...

  11. I hope your stuff has arrived by now so you can enjoy the pretty day in DC in different clothes! Or I think this situation justifies a shopping trip for a new outfits...and just bill the moving company:)


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