Monday, October 3, 2011

When grease attacks

Let's say that over the summer at a favorite Connecticut shoreline haunt, a few drops of butter from a freshly roasted lobster claw land in your lap. And a couple of washes later, you're resigned to wearing a skirt spotted with faint grease stains. Again. Grease stains: the most dreaded of all laundry stains, in my book. (A sign of being a healthy eater, perhaps?) Sigh.

Fast forward a couple of months, and you're helping to host the "Biscuit Brunch" the morning after your brother's wedding, cooking 25 pounds of sausage patties behind a gorgeous Viking stove. You decide it's a good idea to throw on a favorite shirt to do so. You are a wee bit hung over, which might explain that decision. And so an hour of cooking and a couple of hand burns later, your favorite shirt becomes littered with spots of sausage grease. Double sigh.

So you ask your mom the best way to remove grease stains, since moms know these things, and because your stand-by methods have been failing you for all of adulthood. She suggests a certain product, which you promptly buy, but delay trying out because, perhaps, laundry isn't exactly a primary concern at the time.

And then one night at a lovely dinner out, you've ordered your all-time favorite dish and watch in horror as a waiter slowly tips a steaming bowl of shrimp and grits right onto your lap. The roux is the perfect shade of brown, which actually goes rather nicely with the light purple dress you're wearing, save for the scalding temperatures and probability of thigh burns. You laugh it off at the time, because this is what one does in such circumstances, and you drive home reeking of the Lowcountry, in a new dress that you'd really, really like to wear again.

And so that night, peeling a sopping wet, dirty dress off and racing to the shower, it occurs to you: the time has come. It's D-Day for the latest collection of grease stains.

And you know what?

THEY'RE GONE. For the first time in a long history of food-related grease stains.

The dress is purple again, free of all evidence of Lap o' Lowcountry. The shirt is completely free of sausage splatter, good as new. Even the skirt, long-ago surrendered to butter, looks perfect.

If you eat or cook or dine like I do, buy this stuff. Trust.

(Not a paid assessment of this product's wonder.
Not that I would turn my nose up at such offers, either.)


  1. Hooray for salvaging your clothes. I am now craving some shrimp and grits like the ones I had in Charlotte 2 weeks ago.

  2. Thank you! I have several dresses that I can't wear due to stains...hopefully this will be the cure! On another note, I will be in DC this weekend staying right in Downtown. Do you have any casual/moderately upper end restaurant recommendations? My friend has already made a high end reservation for us at 1789 for her post wedding/pre honeymoon dinner (they actually want to hang out with us after their wedding!) but we want something less $$$ for Sunday night. So excited to visit DC!

  3. Hi Valerie - Nice work on the 1789 reservation. Since you're staying downtown and looking for another more casual dinner, here are a couple of downtown-ish recommendations for you:

    - Rasika. Modern Indian food, incredibly good. You must try the crispy spinach!
    - Oyamel. This is a Jose Andres restaurant, a modern take on Mexican food, and because I'm always craving those flavors, I love this place. The tacos, the guac, the SALT AIR MARGARITA! Love it. (His first restaurant is Jaleo, more of a Spanish tapas place, and just a couple of streets over.)
    - Proof. Fantastic cocktails and a great menu.
    - Zaytinya. Delicious Greek and Mediterranean mezze. Another Jose Andres restaurant (he's everywhere in DC), and the head chef used to be Mike Isabella, who left to open...
    - Graffiato. Tough to get a reservation at a normal time since everyone wants to be there, but standout food - and if you're open to eating early or late, you can probably still get in. Mike Isabella is always there, too, and chats up the tables.

    Hope that helps... enjoy!

  4. Much thanks from a klutzy cooker and messy eater. xoxo

  5. Really? Oxy Clean? GREAT TO KNOW. Thank you so much for sharing! With the way my husband eats, I'm going to need to buy a case of this stuff. :)


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